Busy in my Mind

I'm busy with my mind, but not with my body. I can sit here for hours creating things on this new kick-ass computer I've acquired. It's got multi-media capabilities and an internal camera. This morning so far I've conversed with Shownarou via Skype and saw his new lip tusks he got gaged a few weeks back. I've spoke with one of the Badding twins via gmail chat about his yearbook page and overruled his judgement. I have chatted with my oldest son about our plans for meeting tomorrow. And I've ordered our Graceland, Sun Records, Hard Rock Cafe on Beale Street, and various Soul museum tickets and made Heart Break Hotel reservations. Oh yeah, I'm on a roll.

Plus, I've had bad luck on my mobwars game on facebook. I've been busted twice already today for attempting train robberies.

So, will this help me stay mentally acute in the face of Alzheimers, which runs in my family?

These things are on my mind this morning.

The Man

Dammit. It's as if I'm clairvoyant. The man came to my room during second period, when I wasn't supposed to have kids. Of course there were kids in the room; there are always kids in my room. He handed me my manila folder, and explained it contained THE letter that would be on file in my PERMANENT record. I was to read it, sign, and go to the Principal's office in a few minutes.

So, I obliged. I read said letter, which they had all wrong. They said it was my sex101 blog, which it wasn't. It was Thresholds and Other Ruminations. Remember that name.

Lol.

So the meeting in the Principals office was anti-climactic, and we talked Cubbies and motorcycle nights at local bars. The Principal said shit at one point, and the man said they had to cover their ass. . . and I'm the profane one.

Nuf said.

Final Final Finals

Tomorrow is high school final day. That means the last day of regular classes was today, and everyone in the school is happy about it but me. I still have two months of work left on the yearbook, and if history repeats itself, three or four.

Waa Waa, poor me. There, the pity party is over. Hell, who am I kidding? That's what this blog is all about.

The photojournalism kids started presenting their finals today, and they were good -- but the first few who volunteer to go always are. They make photo essays and present them orally using the projector and Adobe Bridge. It's slick -- unless the technology craps out, which is frequent. Like today after school the entire network went down and I couldn't burn the rest of the students' discs. Hope it's up by tomorrow, or else it's Plan B, which I have yet to pull out of my ass.

They have been instructed to put only their top pictures in the folder called "Final Final." Most of them do this, except for the stupid heads who can't follow instructions or read an assignment sheet. That's one of my big pet peeves -- because I so thoroughly give these instructions and utilize all brain styles that it irks me when a student just plain doesn't listen. Like I'm speaking like an adult in the Peanuts' movies: Whaw whaw whaw whaw whaw.

Oh well, the curse of most teachers, I'd assume. I've been told that you should only give students directions ONCE to train them to learn. I just whine when they ask me questions I went over and direct them to their clearly labeled assignment sheet of assorted colors.

So, I wish this was my Final Finals week, but I've signed up for another year. It could be worse: I could be back in 'da Hood. I'll have to have flashbacks to my alternative education years.

Ahhh, those were the days -- when I taught at the roughest school in the Midwest, with the best staff on the planet.

Now I'm in whitey white land with some of the smartest kids I've ever known. And I'm happy.

Until the man messes with me again.

Grape Propel

I love grape Propel fit water beverage. I have two or three a day. It is alway son my desk. Here's a pic to prove it. Me and Pi work on CreativeSuite CS2, which he has been trying to teach me for 4 years now. I still rely on him to help recreate the paper and to do advertising catalogs; he's one in a million for sure. (He has, incidentally, given permission for his image and identity to be used in this blog and subsequent blooks. At a price, of course; he is not stupid.)

Anyway, me and my Propel plug along at XHS. We are contracted for another year, as far as I know, and so we will put together another 9 issues of the paper and one yearbook. We are doing the yearbook online next year, and aside from the Kiwi incident, are all set for a year of getting the book done by June 15th. Then, I go on to other pursuits in the summer of 09.

Oh, and I gotta get that pesky doctorate. For credibility.

Like 25 years in the classroom in one form or another doesn't count.

Dr. Calvin and book signings and adult education for parents of sexually active teens, here we come. Guess I got some 'splaining to do, Lucy.

Graceland Pilgrimage Planning

We've set a date for our Graceland pilgrimage...July 13th is the estimated departure date, and we will book our king-size suite for 3 nights at the Heartbreak Hotel in Memphis tomorrow. I found a super package deal on elvis.com, which has tickets to Graceland (including the planes and the jumpsuits), as well as to the zoo, Hard Rock Cafe on Beale street, two soul museums, and Sun Records. How damn cool is that? Well, pretty cool if you know your Elvis like my Hubby does.

Elvis recorded his first vinyl single, "That's All Right Mamma," at Sun Records in 1953. (His actual first recording was "My Happiness" which he recorded for his mother's birthday at a fair.) He stopped by on his lunch hour from driving a truck. And the rest is history, as "they" say.

Now we just gotta get a new road-worthy, hybrid vehicle to make said pilgrimage with. Gas prices are going through the damn roof, nearing $4 as I write and predicted to go to $15 before it's all said and done.

Why does politics permeate every aspect of our lives?

I just wanna see the jungle room -- OH, and nobody has phooned the exterior of Graceland (can you say stitched-together panoramic shot?) or the jungle room....so we got goals.

Life is good. Except for two things: Hubby's brush with the law (another story) and my brush with Mr. Head Human Resources Guy. He said he'd meet with me before the end of the school year on that other matter, which leaves exactly 4 days and I've heard nothing.

Back to Graceland and our pilgrimage...it will be a blast, especially if that damn yearbook is done by then. It's always something, I guess.

That is the rich tapestry of life: Hunka hunka.

Hobbies

I have a hobby, that I've mentioned in previous blogs: phooning. This harmless hobby combines my love of photography and loathing of sports into one interesting pursuit.

We phooned on the famous AE cows in East Des Moines this weekend, and it was really fun:

When we arrived, the sprinklers were on, but that didn't stop us!

Check out more at phoons.com.

Well, I'm in good spirits still, and it's a 3-day weekend so all is well on this gloomy Sunday morning. I'm thinking about summer, which is a week away, and I'll be glad when we're settled into the June routine: Hubby is teaching summer government and I'll be working on the yearbook most of the month. The youngest boy will spend his mornings at the school, and I will hardly ever see the oldest, now that he's almost 16. We will however, visit and phoon at Graceland this summer, if it's the last thing I ever orchestrate. It's been done before, so I have to find interesting backgrounds on the way and while in Memphis.

So glad that hobbies and not school is on my brain today...that over-active, hunk of junk brain that I seem to be cursed with.

Happy About End of School Drama

Don't know why or how, but my attitude has shifted. I'm happy again. I'm having fun again. Well, I always have fun with high school students: I've never taken it out on them. They don't know the real truth though, which feels dishonest, but I did warn them that big brother is watching and I don't want any computer dishonesty.

But I still catch the little shits on their myspaces....but I guess I can understand. Although I NEVER blogged or played on company time: let's state THAT for the record.

Why am I happy, when I got bad news yesterday that I'm still trying to digest? (I dunno, it might even be approaching PMS, which would be counter-intuitive to my good mood.) Well, my selected editor-in-chief of the yearbook, Kiwi, can't fit yearbook into her schedule. Let me repeat: I've lost my yearbook editor.

She's one bright cookie and has taken AP (Advanced Placement) everything, which are only available during yearbook time, of course. We've decided, after much hand-wrangling and near crying, that she will be co-editor with someone in class. Then, she is taking a yearbook independent study class during first semester and help me get the book organized, and she promised to help at home and during the summer.

That, and the ever-present end-of-year dramas persist: some kids just like school and want to be there and are sad about summer; others are in relationship crisis and are staying away from me, which makes me sad; and everyone else just wants to be out of there -- NOW, and have really left me in the lurch in yearbook, AGAIN.

So, I'm happy amidst the drama.

Lottery Tickets and The Future

The future would be infinitely easier if I would just win the damn lottery. I play occasionally, so my odds aren't really that good. But I live in a small, mid-western town that would make a really good story for the news cameras. Big city girl goes small town and wins big.

Plus, I like to think I'm photogenic. You have to look good in that picture with the big check...don't want the relatives coming out of the woodwork.

The first thing I would do, if I were to even win, is to publish my blook (yes, I said blook. That's the blog to book lingo). I mean it's nice to be an obscure writer, but if I could quit that pesky day job in that conservative community and travel a little with the hubby and kid to do book signings...ahhhhhhh, THAT would be the life. Only problem is, at this time, I only have one publisher who has bitten; and that's a subsidy publisher which means they will allow me to spend $10,000 of my own money to see it to print.

So I need a sugar daddy or a literary agent or a freakin' clue.

I choose the agent. So call me. Soon. There's only a few months of summer when I can rely on my moods, and only so many lottery tickets I can buy.

After Graduation

Graduation is today at 3:00, and once again, all I can think about is the talent drain that I'm experiencing. I'm happy for the future of those kids, I truly am. But I'm just a selfish pig.

I'm not even going to graduation this year. I just don't have it in me. When the call for volunteers to work came out, I just said, "Fuck it." I've worked the past two years and it is truly a Maslow's Heirarchy of Needs higher-level, self actualization, kind of day.

But I feel like laying low. I've been building a website for our family business instead. Always gotta be dinking around on the web...and dreaming about the future.

And of course, what I think about now is what happens after graduation, when I still got over 150 pages of a yearbook to submit...

It will get done. That is certain. Breathe in, breathe out.

Wine and Cancer Sticks

I predict I will die of lung cancer. I've seen my husband's dad die of lung cancer, and it ain't pretty. But in this time of stress I have resorted to self-medicating behaviors: drinking boxed wine and smoking cigarettes, again.

Damn me.

But, it's coupled as my new weight-loss plan, which has been a bonus. I only lose weight when I'm freaking out about something, and I gain weight when I'm happy. I was happy for quite awhile before "the incident" and so I've developed a healthy belly and rump. So the losing weight part is good for my health. And therein lies the rub.

This too shall pass, I am sure, but I am enjoying every puff in the meantime.

Sick of it all

I'll have another flashback later, to catch you, the invited reader, up.

Right now, I'm sick of it all. Sick of school, the kids, the adults, the work, and for sure, the damn yearbook.

My suspension and censoring has played a severe toll on me: I'm stressed to the max, and cursed with a bad attitude that wasn't there before I got scolded.

And I hate it.

That's all.

Flashback Sequence

Here's what's been happening, going back in time a bit and double spaced:

Thresholds and Other Ruminations

By Delani Bleu

Part Two: Offline

Saturday, April 19, 2008

11:27 a.m.

I got busted. Big. For what? Believing that the US Constitution’s First Amendment would protect me. Evidently, it doesn’t protect teachers much.

Part One: Online is now officially offline.

Here’s what I wrote to my union-appointed lawyer, with edited names, of course:

Meeting with Head Cheeses

On Wednesday, April 16^th, I received a call at 3:20 from Mr. Principal that I was to go to Mr. Head Human Resources Guy’s office at 3:30 p.m.

There, Mr. Head Human Resources Guy presented information about my “facebook” account. I informed him that what he had in front of him was not facebook, but in fact was my blog. He had a copy of the blog that had been highlighted and had many sticky notes attached to it, and looked well worn.

He went through several areas of concern in the blog, including;

· My admission that I had fallen asleep one day in yearbook class.

· The profane language.

· Students were pictured, and therefore, identifiable.

· My classroom was pictured, therefore, identifying Town X.

· Company Y was mentioned, therefore identifying Town X.

· I said XHS, and I live in Small-town USA, which therefore, identifies Town X.

· I had written, “I am on drugs, legal drugs prescribed by a physician….” And I replied that yes, I was on anti-depressants. Mr. Head Human Resources Guy then said he was just reading what legal counsel had pointed out, and I said, “I am sorry, I will shut up now.”

· The Badding Twins were mentioned, and their parents would not be pleased.

· My business venture on Cafepress.com was mentioned, and the phrase was referred to with some adjective similar to crude. Mr. Principal asked if it was just an attempt to make money, and I said yes, which had failed as I had not made any money from it.

I was told that I was being disciplined and was suspended for 3 days with pay. I was to report to the same office at 1:00 on Monday, April 21, 2008. I asked for a piece of paper to write things down, as I was not retaining information. I was told that I was to remove the offending blog from the Internet this evening.

Fun stuff, huh? Of course the names have been changed to protect the innocent…

Sunday, April 20, 2008

9:26 a.m.

I also forgot to mention the part where Mr. Head Human Resources Guy asked me if I swore like that in the classroom. I said, “Of course not.”

That part keeps playing over and over in my brain this weekend.

That and the part where select former and present students really miss reading my blog. I told them via gmail that I am not a role model; that I am bad; and that most importantly, don’t ever forget that big brother is watching. I also turned off the forum, which I forgot to let Mr. Union-Appointed Lawyer know.

Saturday, May 3, 2008

10:12 a.m.

Wow. I’ve not had a blog hiatus like this in over a year. I am having writer’s block now that I’m offline and have no immediate audience. This is strange; to investigate the importance of tone, audience and intent in a piece of writing.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

9:08 a.m.

What was my intent? Now that I’ve had my hands slapped by “The Man.”

I have been ruminating over that.

Well, speaking of hand slapping, I better get back to the story at hand; my suspension and subsequent reinstatement.

We're Back!

By invitation only, the Thresholds saga continues for Delani Bleu and her cast of high school journalists.